I want to be careful here because this topic gets deliberately muddied. Being against open border policy is not the same as being against immigrants. It is not the same as being against people who are desperate for a better life. Most conservatives I know have deep respect for the courage it takes to leave...
Letters To Nobody
What It Actually Costs To Say I Was Wrong
I want to talk about the people who can do it. Not the people who say sorry without meaning it. Not the people who offer a qualified admission designed to spread the blame thin enough that they are only technically responsible for a fraction of it. The actual people. The ones who can look at...
The Uncommon Man
The Moment I Realized I Had Been Faking Strong
I used to think being strong meant never letting anyone see the strain. Keep the face neutral. Keep the voice steady. Handle whatever comes and handle it alone. Never ask for help because asking for help meant you were not equipped for the load you were carrying. I wore that version of strength for years....
There used to be prayer in public schools. I know there are people who will immediately tell me why that is a good thing. Separation of church and state. Religious diversity. Nobody should be forced to pray. I have heard every version of the argument. Here is what I know. The year prayer was removed...
Letters To Nobody
The Pride Behind The Position
Being wrong is not the same as being bad. Most people know this intellectually. Almost nobody behaves like they believe it. Watch what happens when someone is confronted with clear evidence that they were mistaken about something. In the rare person who is genuinely secure the response is simple. Oh. I did not know that....
The Writing Life
What I Want You To Feel When You Finish Black Water
I want you to put the book down and sit with it for a minute. Not because you are confused. Because something landed and you need a moment before you move on to the next thing. I want there to be a residue. A weight. Something the story left in you that was not there...
The Uncommon Man
The Version of You That Got Away
There is a version of you that never got built. Not because you were not capable. Because somewhere along the way the right voice at the right moment never showed up. Nobody handed you the blueprint. Nobody pulled you aside and said – this is what a man does, this is how a man thinks,...
The government did not set out to destroy the Black family. That is probably true. But the effect is the same whether the intent was there or not. For decades welfare policy in this country carried a quiet condition. If a man was present in the home the benefits decreased or disappeared entirely. The math...
Letters To Nobody
Why Some People Cannot Hear You No Matter What You Say
I spent a long time trying to find the right words. The right tone. The right moment. The right approach that would finally get through to a person who had never been able to hear me no matter how carefully I spoke. I adjusted my delivery. I softened my language. I picked better times. I...
The Uncommon Man
Why Men Walk Away From Church
I want to talk about something that does not get discussed honestly very often. Men are leaving the church. Not all at once. Quietly. One at a time. They stop showing up and eventually nobody notices because the service keeps running and the seats fill with everyone else. The reasons vary. But there is one...